If we’re taking our social cues, philosophical cues, but more particularly, our parenting cues from the self-proclaimed elitists of our day, we might be led to believe that many of our American sons are eaten up with something called toxic masculinity.
So, what should healthy masculinity for young men of any race actually look like in today’s politically-correct society? And how do we help our sons get there without making them feel like they need to apologize for how God has made them? Today we will be discussing Raising healthy, boys in an unhealthy world with Shepherd’s Hill Academy’s Buddy Prow.
Buddy Prow is the boy’s therapist at Shepherd’s Hill Academy and also leads Celebrate Recovery at the Pointe Church in Toccoa, GA. He holds a bachelors degree in Accounting and has received his master’s degree in professional counseling from Liberty University. He is also pursuing his masters of Theology at Liberty University, completing his licensed professional counselor and master addiction counselor certifications. He also served for 6 years as a youth pastor at Lexington Baptist Church. For 10 years he has been a foster parent. He has served as a case manager. He and his wife have 10 children, 5 biological.
Godly Men and Toxic Masculinity
Today we are going to focus on our sons and how to turn them into healthy individuals in their God-given masculinity. There are many things in today’s culture that should alarm us when it comes to raising healthy, godly sons. One thing we see in particular is from the emotional side, specifically anger that comes out in men. Anger is a secondary emotion that is often driven by fear or hurt in men. In today’s world, we have so many options that bring on anxiety, frustration, etc.
Many of the young men we see at Shepherd’s Hill Academy are angry at God. One reason is that they have come from Christian homes where hypocrisy is present. Sometimes in ministry, ministry becomes the mistress of their family. They are angry at God for taking away their parents for the sake of their “mission.”
Men are often the more unresponsive of the sexes. In a church setting, we see that pastors are gearing their sermons towards women because they are responsive, they show up, they are emotionally driven and the impact of the sermon is often more visible. So essentially by doing so, we are alienating men. Men don’t quite communicate in the same way. The other part is that every man’s deep down desire is to have significance, where a woman’s is to be safe. That is why we see that in a healthy relationship a man provides safety for the woman, who in turn provides him with significance.
But what does godly masculinity look like? It’s a quiet confidence. A man must know who they are every day. When you make your identity what’s around you, that changes every day. That’s unstable and unsettling. The best thing to do is to understand what God thinks of you. When you wake up every day you can know who you are and who God thinks you are and that never changes. Being involved in your child’s life is crucial. And be there from an early age to guide them through each stage of life. Allow your sons to try, fall, and try again while you are still around to help them.
- What is the difference between toxic masculinity and godly manhood?
- How do we train our boys up to be men of character?
- At what point do parents need to be involved in developing their child’s masculinity?
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